Iceland

I just got back to the UK from Iceland, where I was playing Messiaen's Turangalila Symphony with the Iceland Symphony Orchestra and Rumon Gamba. This trip really brought me to a state of high excitement, more so than any country I've visited for years. It's hard to say exactly why, but it has something to do with barren places - I find them very fascinating and somehow nourishing. To be in the middle of a wilderness with very little to look at is one of my very favourite places to be. I think it must be partly that the lack of visual stimulation is a very calming thing; maybe also that one's significance (or lack thereof) comes into sharper focus when confronted with such a landscape. Why is feeling insignificant desirable? To me it cuts to the core of what it is to be human - to learn the truth about yourself that you are merely one of countless millions, that you are not worth any more than anyone else, this is a terrible, perhaps unbearable assault on one's pride. Maybe this is particularly true for performers, for whom each concert is a confirmation that we are indeed special - we have all of these people clapping and cheering for only us, it must be true! I believe this is one of the great pitfalls for any performer - the danger of thinking one is special. I think it is the antithesis of what music should be about: a performer sharing his feelings and implicitly saying, 'This is what it is to be human, this is what we share'. But to try and maintain, or even reach this state is a constant battle, for me at least. One of the greatest performances I ever heard was Mario Joao Pires playing the Schumann concerto at the Edinburgh Festival a few years ago. It was a performance that was far from perfect and rather underpowered, but what shone through was a profound humility, and that touched me in a way that I had only experienced listening to Clara Haskil's recordings. I went to meet her after to tell her how deeply touched I had been by her playing and she seemed genuinely surprised and grateful that someone would enjoy her playing.

Somehow I have drifted far from Iceland! Suffice to say, the trip lived up to all my expectations. I found the people marvellous - thinking, positive, down-to-earth. Before the Messiaen, the concert began with a premiere of Þuríður Jónsdóttir's flute concerto, played by Mario Caroli. I have to say, I loved this, both for the tremendous performance and for the rather beautiful piece which seemed entirely it's own thing; unpretentious, with wonderful colours and a very savvy structural sense. Both conductor and orchestra were doing the Messiaen for the first time and I was extremely impressed. They have been nominated for a Grammy this year, by the way. In the end, though, the highlight was a night trip to one of the hot springs in the middle of nowhere. Swimming in 38 degree water with the air temperature minus 11, under the moon and stars, this was something unforgettable.